THE REALITY OF ESCAPING INTO FANTASY
I just finished watching the last episode of Bridgerton, season three. I am a bit embarrassed to admit it. I would rather say I watched some historical documentary than I spent hours and hours enthralled by a sexy Regency soap opera, but I did. Sometimes I just need to escape into total fantasy, which Bridgerton has in spades. In Bridgerton there are no poor people and no racial or social unrest. The biggest problems people face are concerns about what extremely attractive and well dressed person they are going to marry. There are no termites in their houses like there are in mine. Evidently there are no bathrooms either but they manage to stay impeccably groomed through every crisis that befalls them. So what has kept me willing to revisit this impossible world night after night? I was especially intrigued by watching a woman who was not a size zero playing a romantic lead. That is a fantasy I can get into. A MIRACULOUS TRANSFORMATION It’s rare to see a curvy woman portrayed in such an appealing way. I thought about how her character, Pentelope Featherington, has transformed over the three seasons of Bridgerton. In the beginning she is unsure of herself and uncomfortable in the whirlwind social world of fancy parties and balls. Then it is revealed to the audience that, under the pen name Lady Whistledown, she is the secret author of the local gossip newsletter and a talented writer with a unique view of people’s vulnerabilities. In season three she steps out into society as a new woman (with behind-the-scenes help from an army of hairdressers, costume designers, and makeup artists), and transforms from an ugly duckling into the belle of the ball. It makes me imagine what my life would be like if I were a character in Bridgerton. I don’t feel ugly but I have never felt beautiful either. In my fantasy world, I would love to be transformed, like Pentelope, into a new woman, pampered by all those makeup artists and costume designers. I can see myself in a Regency inspired empire waist dress. They were very popular in the 1960’s and always one of my favorite styles. It’s a look that is flattering on almost any body. I would forego the corset, however, as a enjoy breathing more than I want my waist to look smaller. BECOMING LADY WHISTLEDOWN I am too old to be one of the young ladies husband hunting at the ball, but I would enjoy stepping into the shoes of Pentelope to become the next Lady Whistledown, author of the local gossip newsletter. A gossip column is a bit like a blog and I have lots of experience writing. Words have power and writing has the power to transform.
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I have never been a fan of creepy crawly creatures, but right now they seem to be particularly bad. Cucumber beetles and cabbage worms are carving big holes in my precious plants. Termites are eating my house. How can such small creatures take up such a big space in my consciousness?
SMALL BUGS AND BIG FEARS Yes, they are small and I could easily squish them with my bare hands, but the thought of actually doing that makes me cringe. I don’t want to even think about touching anything that looks like a miniature space alien. Plus they have the power of numbers. I could ignore the three lousy cabbage worms I found on my sunflowers, but if I don’t take action now they will soon take over my whole garden. Unfortunately they aren’t the only thing I’m worried about. Fear struck my heart recently when I discovered a small tunnel carved into my wood floor. I know I will soon be spending big bucks battling the untold number of unseen termites munching on my house. I am overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of insects threatening my sense of peace and security. I feel powerless. It’s not that I can’t do anything. I’ve been checking my garden every day for unwanted critters and I have contacted the exterminators to deal with the termites. What makes me feel powerless is that feeling that no matter what I do, the problem will never go away completely. They will come back, or some new unknown mini monster will show up when I least expect it. I will always have to deal with these insects in some way, shape, or form. WHAT’S REALLY BIG AND WHAT’S SMALL The reality is that there are a lot more of them than there are humans on this planet. Probably long after the extinction of mankind, insects will be the creatures that survive. Perhaps in some dystopian future they will rule the world. I have an image in my head from one of those science fiction movies with ants the size of a tank threatening tiny humans. By reversing the natural order of things, these movies play on our fears that we are not the masters of our lives, They make something we think of as small and unimportant big and threatening. I am beginning to see why I needed to write about my fears and frustrations over termites, and cabbage worms. This is bigger than bugs. They are just a symbol of the powerlessness and fear I feel about having to deal with more than I can handle, whatever that might be. What’s really bugging me is that I’m not sure why I feel so overwhelmed right now. I think I am confused about what issues are actually big and what is small. I have to admit that if termites and cabbage worms are my most pressing problems, my life is relatively peaceful and easy compared to what is going on in the world. I guess I should be grateful that the bugs are giving me something concrete to focus on instead of worrying about all the bigger issues I have no control over. |
Leslie Masona woman in search of her post-retirement future Guess what! By subscribing, you get notices about the latest Little Old Lady with Cats posts sent to your mailbox!
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(from an entry posted on 5/1/2015) “I definitely fit some of the characteristics of a little old lady with cats: Retired - check, Single - check, Like to knit - check, Have cats - check. . .I do not want to get stuck in my Little Old Lady persona, however. In fact, this blog is a risk taking experiment in exploring and redefining what I want my retired life to look like.” Categories
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