A WET WINTER
It’s winter in California and that usually means rain. Unlike my childhood in Minnesota where the weather could vary wildly in just one day, California is relatively predictable. It’s dry in the summer and wet in the winter. This winter has been particularly drenched. Rain. There is something about it that feels sad and comforting at the same time. Grey skies bring up melancholy feelings in the same way a sunny day lifts my spirits, but it’s not a depressing sadness. In the winter, when the rain comes down in torrents, I just hunker down and avoid going out. There is a sense of coziness and safety when my little house protects me from the crazy weather outside. Sometimes I feel like I am in a car wash when the rain crashes and splashes against my big living room picture windows. It’s a little scary, but it’s awe inspiring too. BLUE FEELINGS ON A GREY DAY I tend to go inside myself and feel the poignancy of loss on a rainy day. It’s not just the loss of friends and family that flows through my mind, it’s also other things I have had to let go of. At this time of my life the affects of aging are particularly apparent. My hair is thinner but not my body. My balance is a little iffy. I forget the safe places that I purposely put things so that I won’t forget where they are. I am beginning to realize that taking a major trip to some exotic foreign place won’t be as easy as it used to be. My idea of a future adventure is more likely to involve watching it on TV rather than being there in person. LOOKING FOR ADVENTURE Actually, I don’t need to go far from home to start a new adventure. I just welcomed in a new housemate. She is 32 and the youngest housemate I have had in quite a while. This made me think about where I was at 32; I was recently divorced and struggling with what being single had in store for me. Like the fluctuations in the weather, there were a ton of ups and downs looming in my future. They all helped me find myself and build a new life. A big part of that was buying my little house and a few years later putting my first ad in the newspaper to rent out a room. My new housemate moved in yesterday. She is just starting on her life’s adventures, like I was at her age, and she is looking for a comfortable and peaceful place to call home. I am happy that I can offer that. I am also happy that I am not 32. My life may not be opening up before me like it is for her, but it’s not over yet. I have the experience and fortitude that comes with being a little old lady with cats. I’m not concerned that this rainy day might make me feel a little sad. It’s just part of life. Sadness sometimes balances the ups and downs and makes the happy times seem even better. What the heck, let it rain!
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A Month of AdventuresLEAP OF FAITH
It’s a good thing there is an extra day in February this year because it is turning out to be a month packed with adventures. I am welcoming a new housemate, I had jury duty but avoided serving on a murder trial because I am getting cataract surgery, and I am going to a Super Bowl party featuring the 49ers. I am also revisiting speed dating. Talk about a full calendar. Not only is this a leap year, it is turning out to be a leap of faith month and has required a lot of deep breathing and stepping out of my comfort zone. I have already been through one of the hardest parts, interviewing and finding a new housemate, but cataract surgery and speed dating are looming. I have to admit that fear is hiding out in my solar plexus, but it hasn’t stopped me from moving forward and embracing all of these opportunities for change. NEW HOUSEMATE There was a point during the process of finding a new housemate where I almost gave up. I was tempted to take my ad off of Craigslist and wait a little longer before putting myself through the stress of making such an important decision. Then I met a young woman who was looking for a peaceful home. She is gainfully employed and has an aura of warmth and maturity. Despite the fact that I am old enough to be her grandmother we have a lot in common in terms of lifestyle and she seems perfectly happy to share a house with a little old lady with a cat. She is moving in next week. JURY DUTY I had some misgivings about jury duty but fate stepped in and saved me from having to make another hard decision. It turned out to be a murder trial. I have been called in for jury duty in the past and, although I was never selected to be a juror, I feel it is my civic responsibility to serve. Most of the trials were civil cases or DUI’s. This one would have been a whole other story. Despite the fact I watch murder and mayhem all the time on TV, the idea of having to experience the realty of this kind of violence would have been gut wrenching. I was relieved that I was excused because I have cataract surgery scheduled in February and March that would conflict with the time of the trial. I never thought I would feel this grateful about having sharp instruments poked into my eyeballs. THE SUPER BOWL The cataract surgery doesn’t happen until the end of the month so I will have lots of time to worry about it. Thank goodness my social calendar will provide some distractions. I have been invited to a Super Bowl party. I am not a football fan but I love parties. I have many fond memories of past superbowls where my football loving friends and I cheered on the 49ers. Those were the days of Joe Montana and Steve Young. I lost track of who the next generations of quarterbacks were but I love the things I have heard about Brock Purdy. For one thing I love his name. It sounds like a character from a 1940’s college football movie. I am excited about cheering on an underdog. Regardless of the outcome of the game, being with my friends is a win. SPEED DATING My other major social excursion will be revisiting speed dating. This is version 2.0. The original speed dating event that I went to last year was for people 70 plus. This one is for anyone over 55. I am a little concerned about the age gap. I could be the mother of someone in their mid 50s, so the dating possibilities are not as good. Last year it was very inspiring to be in a warehouse sized room where everyone was as old or older than me but still open to expanding their social life. This year I will be looked at as one of the older folk. There is also that social structure where older men are still appealing to younger women but not visa versa. I met some interesting people last year and actually ended up having a couple of dates, so I am willing to sacrifice two hours of my time and risk feeling rejected. It can’t be any worse than having cataract surgery. A NEW VISION This is turning out to be an interesting leap year. On February 29 I will be having new lenses implanted in my old eyes. I am looking forward to seeing better beyond just the physical change. The broader effect of a new vision is dependent on my willingness to take a leap of faith despite my fears. |
Leslie Masona woman in search of her post-retirement future Guess what! By subscribing, you get notices about the latest Little Old Lady with Cats posts sent to your mailbox!
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WHAT IS A LITTLE OLD LADY WITH CATS - REALLY?
(from an entry posted on 5/1/2015) “I definitely fit some of the characteristics of a little old lady with cats: Retired - check, Single - check, Like to knit - check, Have cats - check. . .I do not want to get stuck in my Little Old Lady persona, however. In fact, this blog is a risk taking experiment in exploring and redefining what I want my retired life to look like.” Categories
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